Caregiving
We made a vow; we promised in sickness and in health, we would stay with our partner for life. We love our child no matter what. They are a part of us and have stolen our hearts. BUT—
Some days are hard. Some days are lonely. Some days are beyond what we think we can give, and still, we must confer.
There are many facets of caregiving. Caring for a physically ailing spouse or friend looks much different than caring for an aging parent or someone with dementia. Caring for someone with Alzheimer’s is much different than caring for a special needs child. There are many books you can obtain from libraries or booksellers. This will be a blog about caring for the caregiver.
Don’t lose yourself in the process!
Help Is On The Way
As you care for your loved one and the days pass, the dedication and determination start to feel more like work—a bit draining on the nerves—thoughts you didn’t know you could have start to arise. It’s normal, and you are not a monster. It may be time to recruit some...
Mindful Anger
I don't want to belabor this point, but there are many emotions with caregiving. The care receiver is losing their independence and watching and waiting as their cognitive and physical abilities dwindle. Fear, sadness, anger, and grief are a mixture of emotions that...
Feeling Inadequate
Caregiving, whether that be for a disabled child, an aging parent, or our spouse or friend, feels like it’s hard to see the forest for the trees. Not sure where that idiom comes from, but I remember feeling very confused some days as to what was the hottest...
You Can Only Do What You Can Do
I remember the last days of my husband’s life, and I was driving an hour to visit him in the hospital every day. I stopped first at my favorite drive-thru for a Sumatra with an extra shot of espresso. Although I tried to relax on my way, I was also wondering how I...
I Want Sleep!
There is nothing new about the fact that we need sleep to function at our best. It’s not news that caring for someone, whether that be a sick or disabled child, an aging spouse, or a parent, getting enough sleep is difficult. Without adequate sleep, a caregiver’s...
Reframing Your Art of Life
I was a caregiver for ten years for my husband. He had diabetes and lost much of his sight due to this disease. He had a toe amputated and eventually started on dialysis and then a brain aneurysm and heart problems. Grief was at our heels the whole time. First was a...
Dementia, Part 2
Dementia can feel like being in a foreign land with people barking orders in a different language. It is frightening and confusing. How comforting it is when we feel frightened or confused to have a best friend come alongside us. Caregivers get to be that best friend....
Dealing with Dementia
I have cared for people with dementia, but as a nurse, not a relative or spouse. I saw the heartache and frustration of those who loved someone with dementia, but I cannot address it personally. I know that we need to be clinical, not emotional, or overcome by the...
Caring for yourself
There are some common feelings that caregivers experience. You know them personally if you are a caregiver or even if you are facing the possibility. They are guilt, inadequacy, and the "ick" factor. Some caregiving moments can be gratifying, and it's okay to wish...
Just Breathe
"Just breathe!" Two words with a lot of meaning, especially If you are feeling stressed or overcommitted. As a caregiver, do you remember when you didn't feel stress or overcommitted? Taking deep breaths has more value for your life and mental health than we may...
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